Our relationship with food is very complex and has often many layers to it. A baby is usually given milk or a dummy when it cries, then as it becomes a child, sweet treats are often used as a bribe for good behaviour or for being quiet. Children learn to put something in their mouth as a soother.
Then in later years, eating everything on our plate is regarded as a sign of good manners, appreciation for what we have been given. Leaving food uneaten is seen as waste and a bad thing. In families that have had experience of war years and rationing, or had financial hardship, the message to eat everything and waste nothing is often reinforced repeatedly. It becomes a core value in our lives.
Healthy Casseroles
Then comes the other side of the spectrum. Appearance comes into the equation, being slim and looking good. Having spots or bad skin, being too fat and unathletic or too thin and skinny all contribute to a young person being singled out for negative attention. This happens with both young boys and girls and can have a major impact on personal confidence and self belief. Children tend to want to fit in and be the same as everyone else. This is why uniform brands are so popular - they help form a group bonding mentality.
Many young people do not have the skills or resources to confidently deal with negative attention. They may find that their friends disappear for fear of being picked on too, and so they can become isolated and feel alone. Some schools and colleges provide counselling services for this very situation and this can provide an invaluable lifeline for young people.
In other situations the young person may feel that they have no one to talk to. If the home situation is difficult and parents are splitting up or are working long hours, they may not want to add to the burden and so keep their problems and concerns to themselves. Even young people with very supportive home lives may feel that any problems that they have are their responsibility and that they should be able to cope themselves.
Mealtimes too are often erratic. Many families do not even own a dining table and many people, of all ages, eat on demand and find their own meals. Young people often do not know how to cook or are not prepared to spend the time preparing a balanced, healthy meal when heating a pizza quickly in the microwave or making a couple of slices of toast will suffice. Fast food and takeaways are quick and fairly cheap options too.
So, what can be done, as a parent or carer, to teach young people how to take better care of themselves and move away from high fat, sugar and salt options:
- Plan meals a week ahead. Put the planner on the kitchen wall chart so that each menu can be seen clearly and everyone knows what is available to eat.
- Have a big cooking session once a week and bulk prepare healthy freezable meals, that can be quickly re heated in the microwave. Lasagne, cottage pie, casseroles, are winter favourites with many young people.
- Make cooking fun
- Try to have a family meal once in the week and on a Sunday. They are a good way of touching base as a family and are also a way of noticing if anyone seems to be having personal problems.
- Let each member of the family take it in turns to suggest a meal that they would like to eat. Involve them in preparing it.
- Have sugar foods as an occasional treat, interspersed with fruit and other healthier options.
Making food more fun and less stressful can provide an important lesson in a young persons lifetime relationship with food. As such, it becomes more comfortable, healthy and balanced.
Issues With Food - Improving a Young Person's Relationship With Healthy Eating
Susan Leigh is a Counsellor and Hypnotherapist who works with:
- stressed individuals to promote confidence and self belief,
- couples in crisis to help improve communications and understanding
- with business clients to help support the health and motivation levels of individuals and teams
For more information see http://www.lifestyletherapy.net
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